Woman wants to know if she’s wrong for telling off a friend whose kid lost valuable wedding ring
How do you handle it when a friend’s child misbehaves and they don’t discipline them? That’s the question central to a post on Reddit’s “AITA” forum going viral because it’s left so many parents shaking their heads.
The post starts with the writer explaining that she had some friends over to her home for lunch — and several of them brought their kids.
“One of my friends, Nora (28F) has a 4 year old son (Jack) that is notorious for being naughty,” she wrote. “Jack doesn’t get along with other kids and is a constant source of crying and screaming. Nora brought Jack over. He said he wanted to take a nap so I showed Nora the guest room and told her to make herself comfortable. Nora came back downstairs after a while and we hung out.”
The writer continued, “Now, around 40 minutes later Jack came back down and was smiling like crazy. He had my wife’s (Kate – 29F) wedding ring. Kate is a doctor and doesn’t take her ring to work. She leaves it on our nightstand. Jack had clearly gone into our bedroom. I told Nora I’d like him to give the ring back. Nora said he’d just get bored with it now and that I needed to relax. A few minutes later I asked Jack to please give the ring back. This triggered something because he ran to the window and threw the ring out in our spacious backyard.”
At this point Nora was up to discipline Jack and help find the ring, right? Wrong.
“I got really, really mad. Kate adores her ring, and I had it custom-made with many little touches. It was extra special because it resembled a ring in her nana’s family that she couldn’t have because she chose to marry a woman,” the writer continued. “So after all that I told Nora her godd*mn son had no manners and she needed to do something about him, maybe take him to a doctor because this is not healthy kid behavior. She got very upset and left. Other guests started leaving too.”
After spending the evening with Kate searching for the ring, it didn’t turn up. To make matters worse, the writer says people in the friend group are saying she was a jerk for how she spoke to Nora and Jack, so she came to Reddit to ask if she’s really in the wrong.
Um, no. Thankfully, the comments quickly set her straight.
“Your ‘friend group’ can get on their hands and knees and comb every inch of your yard, too, or they can never be invited back to your home,” the highest-voted comment reads. “And if you never find the ring, you can ask for a new ring to be made, to the exact specifications, and Jack’s mama can pay for it. NTA (Not The A**hole). Jack’s mama was responsible for her child. She can pay to replace what he threw out the window, (while she did nothing), even if you have to get a court judgment to make her.”
Another highly voted comment adds, “The child behaves that way because his mother lets him, not because there is something wrong with him so it was kind of mean to say them when your real issue is that your friend is a shit parent. I would not invite that friend back over since her manners were just as atrocious as her child’s.”
Another weighs in, “NTA re the kid. Not kids fault either. His Mom sure is though.”
Oh, and tons of comments are encouraging the writer to reach out to community groups of “treasure hunters” with metal detectors who might be able to help find the missing ring. Many of them have encouraging stories of finding their own lost jewelry this way, so hopefully this story will have a happy ending soon.
