Sheila Sim admits judging mums for their outfits before she became one
The local actress and model shared that she had apologised to a lot of friends for being judgemental in the past.
Is there a ‘cut-off’ age for crop tops and long hair? Well, it feels like society certainly thinks so, and expects women to dress a certain way once they are older or become a mum.
Those were the experiences recounted on Jade Seah and Sheila Sim’s latest episode of their Wonder and Wellness series.
Their guest, Jacqueline Khoo (producer of the show and their mutual friend), revealed that a lot of people have told her not to keep her long hair because she’s in her 50s.
One person even likened her to a pontianak (a female ghost or spirit in Malay and Indonesian folklore).
This prompted a discussion on the expectations of women’s dressing styles, especially after they have children.
Local actress-model Sim, 39, admitted that she used to judge mothers for what they wore.
The first ‘victim’? Her own mother, and Sim was only 10 then.
She said, “There was once my mum wore a skirt above her knees. I told her ‘Why you wear until like that?’ I was 10.
“Before I was a mum, there was this friend of mine who went to ZoukOut, and she wore this really sexy, lacy thing and she’s a mum of two. And then I’m like, ‘Wah lau, mum already, why you still wear until like that?’”
Sim confessed that she would not have judged her friend if she wasn’t a mother.
“But now that I’m a mum, I’m like, ‘Why cannot?’ Mothers also need to have fun what,” she exclaimed.
No crop tops at 40?
Seah, 40, added to the discussion by sharing her experience with somebody who asked how long she will continue to wear crop tops and shorts.
“But you have such nice abs!” Sim responded.
Seah replied, “It doesn’t matter because I’m 40 now… Most of the days if I go to your house or whatever, this is my normal attire - crop top and shorts. It’s the easiest, most comfortable for me.”
Sim responded exasperatedly, “Who sets all these rules? Who? People always say ‘They say, they say’ [but] who is they? Who is this mean ‘they’?
“You be critical of yourself, keep it at home. Don’t need to influence other people. If people want to wear crop tops, then so be it.”
That said, Sim also revealed later on that the reason she judged other mums for their clothes was because she felt it set a bad example for kids.
However, she has changed her way of thinking since becoming a mother herself, and now feels that it’s easier for other people to comment on others when they’re not in their shoes.
Sim has two daughters - two-year-old Layla and four-month-old Skyla - with husband Deon Woo, whom she wed in 2018.
She said, “It’s very easy and comfortable for them to say something mindlessly, but then they don’t realise that all these mindless sentences or words are actually very hurtful for people in that current situation.
“I feel like I’ve changed a lot since I’ve become a mother. I’ve actually messaged a lot of my friends and apologised because I was very judgmental.”
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