It's just getting boring now. After a few months of friends and laughing and actual trousers, it's back indoors indefinitely: the modern-day equivalent of a rainy lunchtime at school sat in front of the same episode of Julia Jekyll & Harriet Hyde. Except this time, the rain never stopped. And we now pay tax. 2020: you're a gem.
The sense of gloom is pervasive. Even your groceries seem to rot around the nice man on the checkouts, hazmatted to the nines like the Big Pharma villain of a particularly bad Resident Evil adaptation who just can't quite believe what his great idea for 'Q2 profit velocity' turned into. But one day, we'll be out of the sweatpants, and back into the suits. There are vaccines now! (Hopefully!) Ignore the constant 'PLANDEMIC' tweets of your weird cousin: this is really good news! So use this time resourcefully. Watch even more TV. Crack open that third bottle of rosé: you deserve it. And consider your research for the next party season over, because this man just wore the suit we all want.
At the China International Import Expo – a bit like a YouTube haul video, but for one of the world's biggest economies – actor Hu Bing went and sat on various new flashy toys in a new flashy suit from Dolce & Gabbana. But it's not flash flash. This is Sicilian flash. An innate ability that's almost exclusive to Italy's southern football, the homegrown label is capable of creating suits that command a double-glance. A black, pinstriped three-piece shouldn't be this punchy.
And yet. One: the fit is immaculate, which will do a great deal of lifting in the old business of suit-wearing. But also look to the details. Though lapels on steroids have been something of an enduring trend, they're not going anywhere. They also draw the eye from left-to-right, adding the illusion of bulk if you too haven't got quite into the swing of a Zoom powerlifting class (and that is absolutely OK). A chained collar pin is also just the right amount of gold; just enough to whisper "I want the contract on the Bellagio closed by midnight, Chuck" without going into unbridled Liberace mode. And don't forget the power of a roll-neck. Endorsed by many a fair Esquire colleague, it dresses down the suit but still keeps everything dressed-up. It says you're effortless, but still making the effort. You are Clark Gable.
Because when we're all outside again – and we will be – effort will be required. For all this chat of a changed world, human beings have a remarkable knack for going back to normal and pretending nothing ever happened, like the import expos of China, or sitting US presidents. The legwork of finding a suit has already been done, though. Now, you've just got to wait for the really fun bit: wearing it.
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