Love blooms again in a time of coronavirus as borders open

Ulla Lundgaard was relaxing in front of the television with her long-term German boyfriend Andreas when Denmark's Prime Minister dropped the bombshell that would tear their lives apart.

"It was unbelievable -- you are sitting on the couch on Friday evening listening to a speech by your prime minister and she’s saying 'we’re shutting down the border tomorrow morning,'" the 50-year-old remembered. "My whole world broke down."

The couple, who have been together since 2003, met because each runs their own, separate container businesses, Ulla on the Danish island of Funen, and Andreas in Hamburg.

Andreas drove back to Hamburg the next day, leaving Ms Lundgaard to host her 50th birthday party alone three days later.

On Tuesday he was finally able to return after the Danish government on Monday eased its strict border rules.

Since this Monday the girlfriends and boyfriends of Danish residents have been allowed to cross the border, so long as they live in Germany or another Nordic country, have been in a relationship for at least six months, the relationship has involved regular face-to-face meetings, and they are able to document the relationship with emails, text messages, photos, letters or other evidence.

He arrived at the border carrying a letter from Ms Lundgaard, a copy of her will leaving him her money, and copies of their emails, ready to show them to the waiting guard.

Now back in Denmark, Andreas says the experience of returning has been "amazing and unreal at the same time".

He added: "Everybody’s all of a sudden thinking that corona has gone and therefore no need of taking care of each other any longer! We are so afraid that this will result in the border closing again, simply because some people are just too stupid or ignorant to understand or accept the new rules in our society”

It is a dilemma faced by many across the world: how can love survive in a time of coronavirus lockdowns?

Ms Lundgaard is most angry about the government's decision to previously let in only married partners.

"He talks, reads and writes Danish now, he’s part of the local fitness club, all his clothes, his shaving gear, and all his things are here," she complained. "Denmark is like his home.

"I think it's unfair to say, 'if you’re married you can come, but if you’re a boyfriend you can’t come. The government is treating our life partners as tourists.”

But Andreas is more supportive of Denmark's government."I understand why they closed the border, and I also understand why they did it so quick," he said. "They made the right decision, just look at the figures today. If you compare to Great Britain today, which did not lock down the borders, they have a point."

”But once you open up for married couples you should also open up for life partners, everything else is a total lottery and unfair”.

Caroline Ørsum, a children's writer based in Copenhagen, has been in a long-term relationship with Soumu, who comes from Kolkata but lives in Finland, for a year.

Soumu has been flying to Denmark about every three weeks. "We've also spent Christmas and New Year together, and we've also been able to go on small workations together, since we're both self-employed."

After the border opened to romantic partners she hopes to be reunited with Soumu next month. "Hopefully, he's going to come here in two weeks,” she said. "It's been really stressful --  especially the part about not knowing anything, not having any idea and so your imagination is free to run wild."

They each celebrated their birthdays during the period when they were separated.

"We made the same cake in two countries, so we've been watching ourselves on Skype eating the same cake.  . . but it's not quite the same on Skype as in real life."

Ms Ørsum was so frustrated by the border closure that on May 8, she started a Facebook group for lovers separated by coronavirus border closures.

Of the 291 members of Ms Ørsum's group, 25 have a lover in the UK, 17 in the US, 15 in Germany, and 8 in the Netherlands.

Another couple left divided by the border closure - and who will not benefit from its partial reopening - are Canadian Melinda Schneider and her Danish boyfriend Adrian Carlsen.

They met in February 2018, when he travelled to her hometown, Bradford in Ontario, to play for the local Bradford Bulls ice hockey team.

Until the lockdown the two had been seeing each other every two to three months, with Melinda travelling to Denmark, where Adrian is now playing for the Hvidovre Fighters.

"To be separated due to these closed borders has been increasingly difficult, especially not knowing that there is any hope of us being united again in the near future,” she said.

The reopening of the border only includes those resident in Germany and the Nordic countries.

"We genuinely don’t understand what my nationality has to do with my likelihood of infection," said Ms Schneider. "Since Ontario is the last province in Canada to do any opening, I have been home and isolating since I was laid off from my jobs and university converted to online instruction on March 15th."

Bente Strand, 77, from Nykøbing on the Danish island of Falster, met her American sweetheart Matthew Gruskin, 78, while backpacking in Greece back in 1965.

The couple hitchhiked around the Middle East, before travelling on a Vespa from Athens to Amsterdam. She then lived with him for a year in New York while he finished his law degree. When she returned to Denmark, however, they drifted apart.

After Ms Gruskin's second wife died seven years ago, he got back in touch and the couple have been conducting a passionate late-life romance ever since.

But as Mr Gruskin is American, the border relaxation does not apply to the couple.

"Those of us with sweethearts of other nationalities find it very unfair," Ms Strand complained. "Why not our sweethearts? We are very happy that others are able to see their lovers again, but we can't, and we don't know when we can be together again."

The two have spent more than half of their time together over the past seven years. They had been planning on meeting in Ireland in May, and then flying to Denmark in June before going to see the Faroe Islands.

"We are not young any longer,” said Ms Strand. “Which is why we don't want to waste any time."