Jimmy Fallon has an idea for why the White House is hanging onto the cocaine first mysteriously found in the West Wing in July.
He joked on Tuesday’s “The Tonight Show” that the Secret Service “keeps it on hand any time they’ve got to jumpstart Mitch McConnell.”
The joke, of course, is in reference to the pair of instances where the Republican senator from Kentucky appeared to have a medical episode that left him unresponsive and mute while publicly addressing the press. And though the baggie of the powdered drug — the owner of which remains a mystery — was discovered in the West Wing in July, the joke came in response to the White House releasing the first images of the confiscated item on Tuesday.
“Some news from Washington: I saw that photos just emerged of the cocaine that was found last summer at the White House,” Fallon said, pulling up an image of a baggie of cocaine sitting in a nondescript, gray metal locker.
“I like how the White House uses the same lockers as a water park,” Fallon joked. “Is this the West Wing or a Splish Splash?”
The late night host then riffed on how other Washington, D.C. staffers might be putting the drug to use: “You should try staying awake during a Biden meeting without a little help, OK?”
Fallon then pivoted the monologue to a paired bit with announcer and partner Steve Higgins.
“Gosh, I wonder how much cocaine that is,” Fallon mused.
“Oh, I’d say about $100, $120 bucks, maybe — depends on how good it is, you know?” Higgins said, humorously jittery as if he had imbibed prior to coming onscreen. “You almost done here, Chico?”
“We just started,” Fallon responded, confused.
“Well let’s get moving along, I’ve got nowhere to be, man!” Higgins said, agitated.
Wrapping up the topic, Fallon said, “No one knows who the cocaine belongs to, but this other photo is a little incriminating here.”
The host then pulled up a Photoshopped imaged of President Joe Biden mapped over Al Pacino in “Scarface.”
“Say hello to my little friend — his name is Corn Pop,” Fallon teased.
Watch the full monologue in the video above.