Jeannie Mai Shares Advice She Would Give Women Unsure About Motherhood: ‘Those Are Valid Feelings’ (Exclusive)
"I think the best part about me being a mom is that I actually owned that I doubted myself," says Mai, who shares a 2-year-old daughter with ex-husband Jeezy
Jeannie Mai has some wisdom to share with women uncertain about motherhood.
"For the woman who is not quite ready to be a mom and is maybe doubting herself — that's okay," the television host, 45, tells PEOPLE exclusively while attending the It's A Wonderful Lifetime Yuletide Event on Tuesday, Nov. 19 in Los Angeles. "Those are valid feelings that you've got to lean into."
Mai, who welcomed daughter Monaco with her ex-husband Jeezy in January 2022, says her own parenthood journey has helped her see what was driving her own doubts about becoming a mom.
"I think the best part about me being a mom is that I actually owned that I doubted myself and that I didn't know why I had such walls up about my own abilities," the former co-host of The Real explains.
"And I learned that it came from a lot of childhood trauma ... things that happened in my childhood that I blamed myself for. I still carry guilt [because] I have resentment towards people," she adds.
"Those are not things that I should bring into being a mom," the TV personality continues. "But they exist. And so, it's not to say that you should make them go away, but it's to know that they're there so you acknowledge them and make a clear distinction of who you are today versus where you were then."
Mai says she believes there is power in doubt, as it can lead to self-reflection and, ultimately, acceptance.
"Any of those doubts and feelings are actually part of why you're going to be a bomb mom," she shares. "You just have to lean in, really understand where it comes from, and own it."
Mai also recalls her former, extremely public stance on her desire not to have kids — and just how much her perspective has changed since Monaco came into her life.
"I think the most exciting [thing] that came out of [the past few years] that I never ever realized that could happen for me is becoming a mom. I was known on [The Real] for just not wanting to have a child. And I was about that life. I was outside," she says.
"Now it's my stroller. That's outside," she continues, with a laugh. "It's like a very different part of me that I could never imagine being different. And I also learned a lot about myself becoming a mom."
Mai has also found that her priorities have completely shifted.
"Work has become my secondary thing. Even being a part of this film, Monaco was right by my side," she says, referring to her new Lifetime holiday movie Christmas in the Spotlight.
The How Do I Look? star says she wants to be a strong role model for her daughter, who will turn 3 on Jan. 11. "I'm doing everything to teach her," she says. "I'm doing everything to learn about me in order to teach her the very best side of being a woman."
Christmas in the Spotlight, which draws inspiration from the real-life relationship between Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce, follows a popstar who sparks an unexpected romance with a pro football player. Mai plays the singer's manager.
The movie also stars Jessica Lord, Laith Wallschleger and Haley Kalil.
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Christmas in the Spotlight premieres Saturday, Nov. 23 at 8 p.m. ET on Lifetime.