Jamie Otis is sharing a heartfelt message about the complexities of grief and motherhood.
On Tuesday, the "Married At First Sight" star shared a vulnerable reflection about navigating the balance between celebrating her daughter's sixth birthday and mourning the loss of her grandmother, whose funeral was on the same day.
Otis's video contained footage of her grandmother and clips celebrating her daughter's previous birthdays.
"Today was my grandma’s funeral and my daughters 6th birthday. I cried for one soul, while celebrating another. Life can be so bittersweet," she penned in the caption.
As the reality star grappled with this emotional day, she described wanting to protect her daughter's innocence, admitting, "She definitely doesn't understand death. I want her to be able to keep her innocence as long as she possibly can, so I didn't explain to her what happened to my grandma."
She recalled holding back her tears throughout the day for her daughter's sake. "When she saw me, she only saw happiness and celebration of her life," Otis shared.
"Deep inside I've been trying to navigate the fact that I'll never get to see my grandma ever again," she continued. "I've been hoping she truly had no pain when she passed away so suddenly a few days ago."
Otis also expressed concern for her family, particularly her mother and siblings, who are dealing with the same loss.
Otis contemplated her decision to shield her daughter from the immediate reality of loss.
"I have no idea if my choice of keeping this pain and loss from my daughter is the right thing to do," she wrote. "Of course, I know I can't protect her from loss and grief forever, but since she doesn’t see my grandma all the time I feel it's best to let her keep her innocence until she asks about her."
I cried for one soul, while celebrating another. Life can be so bittersweet.Jamie Otis
In the comments, fans offered supportive messages and praised her decision to "shield" her daughter from loss as long as possible.
"Children deserve to be shielded from loss for as long as possible," an Instagram user wrote. "We're only children once. You did the right thing and you're an amazing, thoughtful mother."
"You know what's best for your baby, and I applaud you for that," someone added.
Another person commented: "I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. You are one strong, brave and amazing mamma."
"There is no one right way to grieve. I think you did what was best for your family," a fan shared.
This isn't the first vulnerable reflection about family matters Otis has shared with her Instagram followers. In May, Otis shared a "heartbreaking" Mother's Day post, revealing her mom was her "best friend before she began using drugs," in the post.
"She became more addicted to her habit and less interested in me," she wrote.
"I'm sick of wondering if my mom's dead. I just want to be able to know where she is and that she is at least safe," Otis continued. "My mom agreed and I feel like we are on the road to recovery for our relationship."