Take Your Instagram to the Next Level With These Hilarious Bios

·8-min read
Photo credit: Courtney Chavez
Photo credit: Courtney Chavez

An Instagram bio may seem like an afterthought (you're too busy coming up with savage captions), but in reality, it's the first impression you're giving off when someone comes across your page. Do you want to show off your education? Or maybe just advertise your fave interests (🐶 ☕️🍣)? The options are literally endless but any bio you choose has to show off your personality and just how amazing you really are. Here are tons of cool Instagram bio examples to help you really customize your profile and take your social media game to the next level.

Funny Bios

The best place to double tap.

My life is split between IG and Animal Crossing.

Friday is my favorite F word.

Don't grow up. It's a trap!

Being an adult is like folding a fitted sheet. No one really knows how.

Out of my mind. Back in 5.

Your secrets are safe with me. I wasn't even listening.

New bio. Who's this?

Here to serve the cat overlords.

Lazy is such an ugly word, I prefer to selectively participate.

I already want to take a nap tomorrow.

BRB, becoming a billionaire.

Recommended by 4 out of 5 people.

My bio is 99% loaded.

Used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not sure.

Not sure what I'm doing but I'm making the best of it.

Scratch here » « to see my secret bio.

Winging it just like my eyeliner.

The bags under my eyes are designer.

I would run the world but the couch is right here.

Posting for a friend and the friend is me.

Paper cut survivor.

Recommended by 4 out of 5 people.

My puns are always intended.

We can only be as strong as our WiFi signal.

Waste your time wisely.

I pause my anime just to post here.

Probably talking about the Patriots.

Photo credit: Giphy
Photo credit: Giphy

Link in bio.

👈 Swipe for less.

No, this is Patrick!

Call me, beep me.

What should I put here?

*Insert clever bio here*

A day in the life of me: Eat avocado toast, post Instagram videos, read Instagram comments.

First I drink the coffee. Then I do the things.

Professional napper.

Always give 100% — unless you’re donating blood.

I don’t look like this in real life.

A caffeine-dependent life form.

Professional procrastinator.

My life is about as organized as a $5 DVD bin at Walmart.

I like long, romantic walks down every aisle of Target.

Error 400: Bio unavailable.

My dog is my best friend.

Photo credit: Giphy
Photo credit: Giphy

I write bios, not tragedies.

Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?

Viewer discretion advised.

I look exactly like my Bitmoji and that is my greatest accomplishment.

Professional inquiries only.

Former child.

You miss 100% of the dogs you don’t pet.

Competitive sleeper.

Hell is a teenage girl.

Welcome to chaos aka what goes on in my head.

I'm the main character in this story.

Is this thing on?

Call me, beep me, if you wanna reach me.

Serious inquires only.

Bone apple teeth.

Nothing to see here.

Just me, myself, and I.

It's me the queen bee.

For legal reasons, this is a joke.

I need a bad bleep.

I was not made to be subtle.

Photo credit: Giphy
Photo credit: Giphy

Food-Related Bios

I eat my cake and wear it well.

A hottie full of hot tea.

Breakfast always comes first.

I see food and I eat it.

Just food pic after food pic.

Sun's out, buns out.

There's no "we" in fries.

Food is the best medicine.

When life hands you lemons, give them back. You deserve chocolate.

I make ice cream disappear. What’s your superpower?

Forever a snack.

The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza for you and me.

Photo credit: Giphy
Photo credit: Giphy

Chocolate never asks me any questions, chocolate understands me.

Donut kill my vibe.

Will post pics for likes.

Taking a poll: coffee or tea?

Part-time sandwich eater.

I only leave the house for food.

Life's uncertain. Eat dessert first.

A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.

The secret ingredient is always cheese.

I followed my heart and it led me to the fridge.

Don’t go bacon my heart.

I apologize for anything I post while hungry.

Will there be snacks?

Pretty much just pictures of food and my dog.

Hi, my hobbies include breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Recovering donut addict.

I eat cake for breakfast.

Photo credit: Giphy
Photo credit: Giphy

If we’re not supposed to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge?

Bacon, egg, and cheese aficionado.

Taki's or don't talk to me.

Lemme get a bacon, egg, and cheese.

I having my cake and eating it too.

I'm on a first name basis with the drive through guy at Taco Bell.

Ice cream you scream.

Fries over guys.

I'm like a chipotle burrito that keeps falling apart.

Me and a bowl of mac and cheese is all I need.

Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggity dog.

Say cheese.

It's the attitude for me.

Straightforward Bios

I'm a whole vibe.

I keep it realer than real.

Always a boss.

I'm dripping in finesse.

Blessed with the best.

Keep them wondering.

Living for the weekend.

I got nothing.

If I was you I'd wanna be me too.

Dogs are my favorite people.

Living my best life.

Me doing me.

But first, a selfie.

I'm all about canceled plans.

Sweet as sugar, tough as nails.

My standards are high… just like my heels.

Risk taker. Adventurer.

All I do is win.

Who runs the world? ME.

Living life on my own terms.

My lipstick always matches my mood.

I woke up like this.

Hey now, hey now!

A human. Being.

Anything but predictable.

Meet (name).

This is me.

Welcome to my world.

Thank you, come again.

Keepin' it real since 2000.

This is me.

Photo credit: Giphy
Photo credit: Giphy

Making history.

Daydream believer.

Just a gal with a lot of spice.

So far, so good.

Thanks for checking in!

Stay weird.

Hot and dangerous.

Photo credit: Giphy
Photo credit: Giphy

Happy stalking!

Fake it til you make it.

This is the story of my life.

Catch me on Sims.

Socially awkward and ready to party.

Party this way.

The man, the myth, the legend.

It's me. I am the moment.

Are you ready for this?

My beautiful crazy life.

Busy doing hot girl stuff.

Happy and sad at the time.

Emoji Bios

Be 🍁ing in myself.

🧂but 🍬

🍫🍫🍫. That's it. That's the bio.

I'm in 🔋saving mode.

My life with the 🐶🐕

The world is 📚. Let's read them together.

Paradise found 🌴

Sweet like 🍯.

Obsessed with tacos 🌮

Keeping it 💯

You know I'm a 🌟

🌹colored glasses

Catch ✈️ not 😢

Welcome to my 👑dom.

Traveller ✈️ Book Lover 📖 Obsessed with cheese 🧀.

L💖VE is in the air.

👇 Check out my life👇

L❤️ ver not a fighter spreading ✌️ all over the 🌎.

🐦: (twitter handle) 👻: (snapchat handle) 🎥: (youtube handle)

Made in 🇬🇧.

99% ☕️.

Equal parts 💄 and 💪.

📍 Depends on the week

🍩 worry 🐝 happy.

Inspirational Bios

Just another dreamer.

Life has no GPS so I'm making my own path.

Keeping a golden state of mind.

Hooray for every day.

Gotta live like tomorrow doesn't exist.

Do more things that make you forget your phone.

I never lose. I win or I learn.

The best of me is yet to come.

Better an "oops" than a "what if."

I'm the hero of my own story.

Life includes free trips around the sun.

Stress doesn't go with my outfit.

Becoming more of who I want to be everyday.

Happiness never goes out of style.

Just keep swimming.

All about saying yes to new adventures.

Leaving a bit of sparkle everywhere I go.

Realizing that my life is so much better than my dreams.

Sparkle and drown out the dark.

Always wearing my crown.

Real, not perfect.

Where dreams meet reality.

Always practice what you post.

Simple but significant.

Stay humble. Be kind. Work hard.

Take care of your body, it’s the only place you have to live.

Your life does not get better by chance. It gets better by a change.

She turned her cant's into cans and her dreams into plans.

In a world where you can be anyone, be yourself.

Life is what happens to you while you scroll through Instagram.

Photo credit: Giphy
Photo credit: Giphy

Be anything but predictable.

Better an oops than a what if.

It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.

When someone says you can't do it, do it twice.

Always be you.

You can't capture everything, but you can try.

Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light.

Keep going and do it with love.

Live love laugh.

Take a risk.

Be spontaneous.

Live in the moment.

Spontaneity is the best kind of adventure.

The best things happen unexpectedly.

Just keep swimming.

Pain is never permanent.

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