Fletcher Reflects on How Lyme Disease Changed Her Vocal Cords: 'I Can't Operate from the Way That I Was Before'

"I had to let go of this idea of a perfect vocal take," Fletcher told Zane Lowe on Apple Music 1

<p>UMG</p> Fletcher



Fletcher has come to terms with how Lyme disease affected her sound.

In an interview with Zane Lowe on Apple Music 1 on Thursday, the "Undrunk" singer (whose real name is Carrie Fletcher), 29, opened up how the diagnosis affected her vocal cords and impacted her forthcoming album In Search of the Antidote.

Fletcher explained that she had found "the antidote" in women, shows, fans, stages and tequila in the past. But in the past year, "the antidote for me was literal medicine and doctors."

Related: Singer Fletcher Reveals Lyme Disease Diagnosis: 'Taken a Tremendous Toll on My Body'

"I was diagnosed with Lyme disease last year, and I got really, really sick," she explained, adding: "I had to move home and I was getting treatments the whole time, and I was writing this music in between. I was going to the studio and then I would go get treatment, and then I'd go back to the studio."

Battling Lyme ultimately transformed Fletcher's sound.

"It changed my voice a lot, my vocal cords a lot," the "Becky's So Hot" musician said. "And so I had to let go of this idea of a perfect vocal take or a sound that I was so attached to having prior, and I really had to dig to these depths of, what does the sound of my heart sound like? Because I can't operate from the way that I was before."

Because of her illness, Fletcher "took a really big break from social media."

"As I watched applauses get quiet and analytics streams go down and watch[ed] everything get really quiet, I noticed all the other things that got really loud, and that was the darkness in my own mind," she said. "And I was just faced with myself outside of the stories, outside of the fans, outside of any shows. I had to look at what was here in front of me and also wonder why I had allowed myself to get to this point, to push my body so far, to get so sick, and that it took me so long to recognize it, to see it, and to listen to it."

<p>UMG</p> Fletcher



Fletcher "had no choice but to face that truth."

"It feels like I made a pact with myself and I was like, 'I will never abandon myself again.' If I cannot show up and have a regulated nervous system and to recognize when my body's telling me to drink water, telling me to get out in nature, whatever the needs are, the soul needs are, the heart needs are, the body needs are. I won't compromise that ever again," she said.

Fletcher continued: "For the first time in my life, it doesn't feel like there's this separation between Carrie and Fletcher. There's this weaving that's happening of an embodiment of the two, and so I feel so excited to show up in this way."

Related: FLETCHER Admits Embracing Herself 'Took a Long Time' – but Now It's a 'Celebration in My Own Skin'

Fletcher said that her journey with Lyme disease is documented in creating her forthcoming record and in her latest single "Lead Me On."

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On Thursday, Fletcher also shared "Lead Me On," which is from her forthcoming sophomore album In Search of the Antidote and is due March 22.

“Over the years, I’ve looked for the antidote in so many things: women, the road, the stage, fans, spirituality and self-reflection," the pop star said in a statement. “Making this album was an excavation, a deep dive where I asked myself what would truly heal me, and my ultimate realization was that love is the antidote."

She added: "From the Finding Fletcher EP to you ruined new york city for me to THE S(EX) TAPES to Girl Of My Dreams, love has always been my muse. But before now, I don’t think I’d ever really looked at love through all the different lenses and angles and discovered all its infinite manifestations. That’s what this album is about for me.”

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