Fatshaming? Not helpful, maybe love your own body instead

JUNE 14 — I gained five kilos or so, read the numbers on my digital scale.

Alas! It felt like such a setback after having managed to get down to 65 kilos last month after weeks of hovering around 67-68 kilos.

My weight has had many ups-and-downs over the years and 70 kilos is probably the highest it's been.

There is no time for despair. I will just have to do what I always do; look at my habits, figure out how I got here and see if I can remedy the situation.

Yes, I am vain but vanity is a me problem. Is it so bad that I would rather keep wearing my old clothes and not have to go shopping for larger sizes now?

What I do think is a problem is when other people make it their business. No, I don't mean the poor man who thought I was pregnant and offered me his seat on the train.

There is so much hand-wringing online about the likes of Lizzo, claiming she's promoting an unhealthy lifestyle and so many loud noises about the “fat epidemic.”

What I've learned over the years is that weight is a tricky thing. Hormones, illness, stress, changing medications ― all that can play a role in your weight.

You don't know why someone is heavy.

Maybe they have thyroid issues.

Maybe they inherited poor metabolism from their parents.

Maybe they found out their significant other was cheating on them and found solace in too many tubs of ice cream.

What is certain is that it is no one's business but their own.

Yes I do know about the World Obesity Federation's prediction that more than four billion people will be overweight or obese by 2035.

The problem is the metrics we have for obesity, like the BMI, are not truly accurate or dependable measures of a person's overall health.

By BMI metrics, most bodybuilders or athletes with stockier builds would be considered overweight.

At the same time, we have yet to grapple with the sad truth that being underweight is considered a measure of attractiveness.

In K-pop, idols speak of the dreaded 50 kilos as a nightmare weight that they must always stay under ― whatever gender they are.

Why do we not instead focus on asking the right questions, such as “do you have enough energy to go through your daily routine?”

Are people able to access and afford nutritious food?

How do we even define nutrition these days even after we all found out that the food pyramid was a lie concocted by food companies for profit?

Why are we so hung up about people's physical appearances without also taking into consideration their mental well-being?

In my own case, I gave up running outdoors after dealing with not one, but two stalkers. Then I was bedridden for three weeks and then had to deal with our current terrible weather that makes exercise a mad proposition.

It did not help that I have been learning new recipes in the kitchen and still happily eating as though I was running four times a week instead of zero.

At least my vegetarian mapo tofu is fairly decent even with unhelpful comments from friends: “You know what would make this better? Pork.”

In a few hours I will wake up early and go for a walk after walking my dog. Then I will come home, have a coffee and resist the urge to demolish the entire box of cookies I bought from Japan.

What I will not do is check on my weight more often than every three to four days and instead keep to my eight-week walking and reconditioning programme.

It involves a lot of walks.

Weight control is a tricky thing but I have learned over the years that self-loathing does no good, nor does any kind of dieting.

I am grateful for my body, though I do not love my fat rolls.

With every health setback I will give myself the rest and recuperation time I need and accept that as old cars need servicing, this ageing body too needs occasional tune-ups and maintenance.

I have also signed up for a virtual race this time because perhaps I should try racing online before I brave running with a bunch of people, at least until I get my next Covid-19 booster.

You fall, you get up, you learn things, you put on those running shoes and power walk to the char kuey teow stall.

Now if only I could get our politicians to relearn governance instead of relying on those old crutches of populism and racial/religious baiting.

That will probably be a harder task than shedding these extra kilos but I remain hopeful and stubborn; hopefully stubborn enough to keep up with my walks.

The World Obesity Federation predicted that more than four billion people will be overweight or obese by 2035. ― Tsuji/Istock.com pic via AFP

As of late the government seems to be regressing into a pseudo-Umno state of making decisions and it is easy to despair, as a Malaysian who expected better.

I have learned over my many years of falling down and getting back up again that change is possible.

Hard, but possible, like getting used to waking up at 7am and asking the nice dai chow lady for nasi separuh.

There's a nice quote about running from the film Air, that one about the birth of Air Jordans and Nike being saved from obscurity.

“The illusion is that the finish line is the destination. That act itself is the destination.”

Like how exercise and “looking after yourself” shouldn't be about hitting a number on the scale, our dreams for this country should not be about just one lofty “high income nation” goal.

It should be about finally figuring out how we can all make this country better, for every single person, not just the guy with the private jet or three yachts.

We should be an “enough income for everyone” not “high income for the 1 per cent” nation and I'm sorry to tell you this, Malaysians, but getting there won't be a sprint but a neverending endurance race.

In the meantime, I'm dusting off my Asics and asking my knees to forgive me as I make them suffer again, four times a week.

* This is the personal opinion of the columnist.