Dad’s gentle parenting moment caught on camera is healing hearts all over the internet
Kier Gaines is a dad and psychotherapist based in Washington, D.C. He’s currently going viral thanks to a sweet moment between him and his oldest daughter that was captured on video by his wife—and it’s healing grown-up hearts all over the internet.
The video, taken when Gaines’ 6-year-old was upset after she lost a “fun privilege,” is a master class in gentle parenting. The way he speaks to her is kind, reassuring, and endlessly loving as he helps her navigate her emotions with dignity and support so she can learn from the tough moment without ever doubting that her dad is on her team.
“You’re not a bad person,” he tells her, as her sniffles can be heard in the background. “You didn’t do a bad thing. You did what you thought was right in the moment. We’re wrong sometimes. It’s OK. It’s a part of being human, OK? Don’t beat yourself up for that.”
He continues, “When we make bad decisions, do you know what happens? It gives us a great opportunity to learn from them. But don’t be mean to yourself because of that, you don’t deserve that!”
Gaines’ daughter responds, “I’m still mad at myself,” and he replies, “I know you’re mad at yourself. It’s a good lesson to learn. It’s hard growing up, learning these hard lessons, and you’re doing a good job.”
If you’re reaching for the tissues after that affirmation, you’re not alone. The comments section for Gaines’ video is full of people not just praising his parenting, but admitting that as adults, this is what they needed to hear — what they never heard from their own parents.
“This dad just healed all the grown little girls on the internet,” one wrote.
Another commented, “I’m 30 years old crying at this and pretending he’s my dad talking to me.”
Gentle parenting, by definition, encourages a nurturing and responsive approach to childrearing. By being attuned to their child’s needs, responding with empathy, and avoiding harsh punishments or criticism, moms and dads can create a secure attachment and foster a deeper emotional connection with their children. Additionally, kids who benefit from gentle parenting are more able to recognize, understand, and manage their emotions in a healthy way. When parents validate their children’s feelings, like Kier did in the video, they’re modeling appropriate emotional responses, and guide them through difficult situations with patience and understanding, children develop better emotional regulation skills.
In the caption, Gaines wrote, “I’m becoming a fan of allowing my kids to go through and process tough emotions without swooping in to save them necessarily. Just provide a little guidance, reassurance and love.”
If you ask us, he’s doing just fine.
