Chrissy Teigen says her cyberbullying scandal has made her "a better person."
While touting her latest cookbook, Cravings: All Together: Recipes to Love, on Tuesday's Today show, the 35-year-old model spoke about lessons learned after being exposed for past toxic tweets directed at Courtney Stodden and others. She also said she's 100 days sober — after her drinking became "embarrassing" — and talked about how that has also factored into this new, improved version of herself.
"I'm actually 100 days sober today and I'm so excited," Teigen told Hoda Kotb. "I feel so good. I feel very clear-headed. I feel like I've done the work and I just hope these people can forgive and be able to welcome the fact that hopefully they've seen me be better."
Amid an already challenging time, in the wake of a pregnancy loss, Teigen was accused last spring of cyberbullying Stodden in 2011 when the TV personality/model was a teenager. Stodden said Teigen privately DMed her, telling her "to kill myself." Teigen apologized in May and again in June after additional tweets were surfaced. Teigen, who acknowledged she had been a "troll," faced professional repercussions over it.
"You just throw things out there and you don't really think about the impact and the person on the other side," Teigen admitted of how she used social media a decade ago. "I think about how much I've changed — just in the past year — how much I've grown and learned."
She said she learned a lesson after getting "cancelled" over it – and losing work.
"You learn so much in the moments where you do lose so much — you lose it all, your world is kind of turned upside down," she said. "For me, it was a big moment of: Wow, I need to find out how I can be better. How I can grow from this. Learn from this.'"
She added, "There's that old cliché, 'I'm glad it happened,' but truly it made me a stronger person, a better person."
Teigen said, without naming names, that she reached out to the people she bullied after finding out whether they'd be receptive to hearing from her.
"If they accepted [my apology], then that's great," she said of those exchanges. "But they didn't have to either," noting people process things in their own way.
Later, while talking to Kotb and Jenna Bush Hager, Teigen spoke more about her sobriety.
Alcohol "just doesn't serve me," she said. "I had been struggling for the past couple of years. It was kind of an issue. Even just doing interviews and things, I needed a glass of wine. Then it just started getting embarrassing — like at awards shows and [events]."
She said that memes shared of her, including one of her falling asleep at the Oscars, made her intoxication seem "funny and cute," when it actually "became embarrassing."
Her sobriety is a culmination of a number of things, like her pregnancy loss, but husband John Legend also factored into it. She said she did it for him.
"Obviously, [being around] someone like John who ... is so respected and so beloved and so loved, I was like: I can't be the messy one. This is embarrassing."
She said being sober has helped with the therapy she's been in since losing Jack — whom she dedicates her new cook book to.
"Instead of hiding behind alcohol," she's facing her feelings — and past mistakes.