The AI Revolution Is Coming for Your Dating Life

ai dating
The AI Revolution Is Coming for Your Dating LifeJulia Dufossé

But first, an answer to your big question....That question, of course, being, “Will AI fix dating?” Can it even? Because if there’s one thing anyone with a dating app and an interest in hooking up (in any way, short or long term) knows, it’s that this whole current situation is…not ideal. Frustrating at best. Painful or dangerous at worst. And yet we’re all fully indoctrinated, trying en masse to fulfill our romantic and sexual urges via swipe, speaking a dating language—full of breadcrumbing and ghosting and beige flags and GGGs—as if it’s the only way to communicate. Hell, complaining about it all has become a subculture of its own. So yeah, there’s room for improvement. And the companies that have been driving dating for the past decade are betting that that improvement is AI.

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If you know where to look, the story of the revolution to come is clear: In August 2023, Match Group, owner of apps like Tinder, Hinge, and OkCupid, appointed a vice president of innovation to lead a team focused on AI. Bumble has launched multiple new machine-learning-powered features, including one that harnesses AI based on preferences and past matches to increase the likelihood of success. A sea of brand-new AI-powered apps (many of them in the stories you’ll see below) promises to perfect your dating profile, finesse your flirting game, and generally help you put your best digital foot forward. And then there are businesses like Replika unrolling AI bots capable of having full-on virtual romantic relationships with you.

5 Ways AI Can Actually Help Your Dating Life

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The Truth About Bias in AI-Powered Dating Technology

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Photo credit: Julia Dufossé

I Used AI Photos on My Dating Profile and...No One Even Noticed??

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We Asked the Leading Experts in AI and Dating for Answers to All Your Most Pressing Concerns...

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...And We Also Asked the Dating Influencers What They Think About AI

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Exclusive: Bumble Launches New AI-Powered “Deception Detector” to Weed Out Fake Accounts and More

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Photo credit: Hearst Owned

Presenting: The Rizz Report (Yes, It's an App)

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App Review: I Let ‘Texts From My Ex’ Grade My (Former) Relationship

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App Review: Meet SciMatch, Which Uses Your Face to Find You Matches

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Photo credit: Hearst Owned


So back to your question. Will any of this actually work? After six months of researching, analyzing, and, yes, dating using AI, we can report that in some cases, it already is working. And that in others, not so much. We can also report that daters are generally open to this next iteration of dating tech: A new Cosmopolitan-Bumble survey (keep scrolling to read all of our juicy survey findings) found that 69 percent of you are excited about the ways AI could make dating easier and more efficient. Sixty-eight percent think AI can help you feel more confident on the apps. Eighty-six percent believe it could help solve pervasive dating fatigue, and 67 percent believe it can make dating apps safer. (There are plenty of skeptics among you too, as is natural and warranted, because issues like bias, privacy concerns, and catfishing are real.)

The other crucial thing we uncovered: an urgent need for an all-in-one-place manual of sorts that dives deep into what exactly is out there right now, what’s coming next, how to think about it, and, most importantly, how to actually use AI to better your dating life. And so us being Cosmo—your always-expert guide to all things relationships and therefore morally obligated to get here first—we’re giving you that manual. The stories ahead are packed with tangible advice on navigating all this now and in the future. Because although “artificial intelligence” and “romance” may sound as incompatible as they come, there’s no stopping this takeover. As 72 percent of you reiterated, an AI-infused dating future is coming fast, whether we’re ready or not. So let’s be ready, okay?

two hands reaching for a heart
two hands reaching for a heart

Julia Dufossé


Here’s what you really think about AI and dating...

This exclusive data throughout this story comes from a new survey conducted by Cosmopolitan and Bumble between November 24 and December 12, 2023. We polled 5,000 single and actively dating Gen Zers and millennials ages 18 to 42 on their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors around AI and dating.

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of you would use AI to help create or optimize your dating app profile.

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Photo credit: Hearst Owned

of you would rather ask AI than your friends for help choosing dating profile photos.

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of Gen-Z and 66% of millennials would be open to taking dating advice from an AI bot.

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of you would use an AI bot to help you flirt on a dating app. Broken down by age, that includes 81% of Gen Z and 76% of millennials.

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Photo credit: Hearst Owned

of you say that using AI-generated photos of yourself doing things you've done or visiting places you've never been qualifies as catfishing.

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Photo credit: Hearst Owned

of you would share your message history with an AI tool to help guide dating app convos. Broken down by gender, that includes 86% of men and 77% of women.

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of you believe that there should be limits to using AI-generated profile pictures and bios on dating apps.

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of you would use AI to help create or optimize your dating app profile.

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of men and 57% of women would be okay with their partner using AI to do romantic things like write love letters or plan dates, but 59% of you say it would be a turn-off if a partner used AI for everything in your dating life.

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of you would share your message history with an AI tool to help guide dating app convos. Broken down by gender, that includes 86% of men and 77% of women.

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Photo credit: Hearst Owned

81

Your top concerns when it comes to AI and dating apps are...

1. Losing the element of authenticity

2. The potential increase in catfishing

3. The loss of emotional connection

of you would openly discuss with a potential partner how you used AI on a dating app profile.

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of you would use AI to help pick out clothes for a first date (you thinking what we’re thinking? It’s Cher’s iconic ‘Clueless’ closet finally come to life).

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of Gen Z daters and 64% of millennial daters think an AI bot could pair them with a partner better than a human matchmaker could.

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Photo credit: Hearst Owned

of you agree that while AI can be helpful on dating apps, there is no replacement for human connection.

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Photo credit: Hearst Owned

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