From sex hotels, to parties, the odd orgy and the dreadful things that are dating apps, getting down and dirty for an evening of schlong meets crumpet has never been more in your face. And thanks to the age of the Internet, buying gear to get your sex juices flowing uncontrollably has never been so damn easy.
Though we are known the world over as being a nation of prudes, truth be told, from all the revealing Google and Pornhub searches revealed every year, that behind our bolted doors we’re all actually a filthy lot who love nothing better than experimenting in the bedroom.
With sex toys, gadgets, accessories and filthy gear getting more and more popular, safer and inclusive, the demand for spicing up playtime has never been greater. Advice: shrug off your inhibitions, nab a vibrator (or cock ring), and let all your down right scandalous fantasies do all the rest.
Flying the flag for luxe favorites to super sexy bargains and plus size bangers, here’s our insatiable edit of the best online sex shops guaranteed to make you and your mini me explode off the scale.
Best for? Sexpertsâ
Without a shadow of doubt, Love Honey will go down in history as one of the best sex shops to have ever existed. Purveyor of pumps, bullets, rabbid rabbit vibrators and rechargeable toys guaranteed to give you that toe curling triple ‘woooow’, the site’s reviewers add everything from their relationship status to sexuality to help newbies make the best and most informed choices possible. More community than stop and shop thrill, everything is delivered in discreet packaging, and if you spend over 50 smackers, you’ll nab free shipping, too.
Best for? Bondage chic
Restraints to get your blood flowing and your pulse racing – Bondara, as the not so subtle name suggests, is all about the bondage. The usual suspects, including gags, whips, silk scarves, and feather ticklers are up for grabs for veterans and newbies to the ‘punishing’ scene. Apparel is made with safety and comfort in mind (unless you’re into discomfort) and the tips in the reviews thankfully let you know what you’re getting yourself into before you hit the pay button…figuratively and literally.
Best for? Girls and boys into role-play
Though notorious for its ‘OMG’ edit of vibrators (some very well hung), pocket-sized clit stimulators and ravage me up the wall dildos, let’s forget the downright outrageous side to Ann Summers and appreciate this sex shop’s absolutely wondrous selection of role play costumes. Nurses, soldiers, police officer – whoever you want to be, Ann stocks it and more. Best part, sizes start from six to 26, so everyone gets a slice of the fantastical action.
Best for? Boys who like to play, and play hard
If a shop has ‘puss’ at the end of it, you know it’s only got one thing on its mind: sex. With diverse and accessible playtime at the forefront of all its designs, London-based Hot Octopuss is probably best know for its science-first guybrator, AKA, the male vibrator. Designed to stimulate all the sensitive parts of your schlong, the multi-award winning device lets you cum hands free, without the need for stroking. The result? As I’ve said before, an orgasm that is typically longer, deeper and more powerful, leaving your nerve endings tickling and dancing with joy. Buy it guys, and now.
Coco De Mer
Best for? People who adore the luxe life
Coco De Mer is the undisputed Cartier of sex shops. Packing enough high-end kink to satisfy even the fussiest luxe boys, gals and non-binary types out there, expect top-notch massage oils, wax candles (to drizzle Body of Evidence style), risky lingerie and super-charged vibrators – some the best on the market – from this high quality and uber sensual sex toy broker. Fabulous selection of iPhone ready tech, too.
Best for? Plus size hunnies
Camis, chemise and underwear for plus size women ranging from sizes 16 to 20. Harmony is the definition of sexy, with racy ensembles and delicious extras perfect for filling your stockings (including your Christmas ones) with everything your mini-mes so desire. Deliveries over £20 are absolutely free and all products are sent in super discreet packaging. There’s also same day dispatch on goodies ordered before 4pm – just in case you’ve got a major tickle that needs satisfying pronto.
Best for? Exhibitionists
For those Fifty Shades types, Uberkinky is all about the latex and rubber, with costumes, nipple clamps, bodystockings, crotchless chaps and sexy uniform galore ready to set your juices alight. A specialist in fetish wear up and down the country, the range caters to both curious men and women, and there are endless non-binary products to peruse too. Advice: let go of all your inhibitions and let your sweet, sweet fantasies run wild.
Best for? The trans-community and newbie to expert crossdressersâ
Though still massively under represented, politically and socially, Transtoys dedicates their entire sexual mission to ensuring the trans man or woman is fully satisfied throughout their transformative journey. Catering to both pre and post-operation transpeoples, the site is also perfect for men and women curious about the world of cross-dressing, with a collection of curios and options to help you explore your gender safely and with intense pleasure.
Best for? Those who just want to get down to business, and fast
A site that basically gets to the point. Selling essentials, gifts, games, bondage and lingerie for men and women, Sex Toys also has a wildly fabulous selection of bondage and gadgets for couples. The offering is vast, so best to make a night of it because there’s more than enough on this site to keep your bits and bobs entertained for absolute yonks.
Best for? Gay guys who live by the motto ‘anything goes’
Soho (of course) based Prowler, long the home of homosexual and gay lifestyle erotica for over 30 years, celebrates the wonders and joys of in-the-bedroom toys whilst supporting the gay community. Clothing (looks like their huge fans of Aussiebum), toys, books, lubricants, cock rings, bondage, aromas, strap ons, homeware – you name it, they specialize in it. All orders are delivered in the most discreet way possible and major perk is that every purchase over £25 comes with the wonderful thing that is free delivery.
Best for? US imports
Luckily this US gem ships internationally, because its body-safe toys are designed to make you Bend it Like Beckham with tech fashioned to hit your clit and g-spot at the same time. Cute, and dare we say even ornamental, Unbound’s products bring toxic free thrills designed to pleasure and tease the body’s erogenous zones internally and externally. Toy to try? The Bender, a super flex, multi-speed and waterproof vibrator that delivers a spine tingling orgasm that leaves you instantly twitching for more.
Best for? Newbies
Say hello to the online sex shop created for prudes. If you’re new to the game, shopping for toys can be at first, absolutely daunting. Buzz Pinky knows this, so it has designed its entire site to be extremely user friendly. Tools are categorized into drop down menus such as ‘setting the mood’ along with ‘trending products’ – great for choosing toys based on reviews. The blog is also well worth a read, with tips on how to find new erogenous zones and a step-by-step guide to bondage for beginners. Enjoy.
Best for? Solos and couples with impeccable taste
If your middle name is chic, then Lelo has a bunch of toys desperate to ride and take pride of place on your nightstand. Uniquely designed, the brand preaches high quality pleasure with devices made to keep your toes constantly grooving.
For the couples out there, try the Tiani, a Bluetooth controlled vibrator forged to stimulate you and a partner to heaven and back again. It comes in a lovely selection of colours too. On a side note, and for the women reading this, buy the Lelo Sona AND the Sona Cruise, a clit massager capable of giving you multiple orgasms without over-stimulating your bits. Thank us later.
Best for? Vagina icons (like Gwyneth)
Sex toys for the glamour puss hand-selected by none than wellness guru (and Oscar winning) actress, Gwyneth Paltrow. Sexy and chic, from radiance oils, designer couple massaging rings, Dita Von Teese-approved bondage gloves, some seriously sexy Coco De Mer feather ticklers, and if you can get your hands on it, a vagina scented candle, there’s no other Hollywood star out there more qualified to add an extra dose of bang to your bedroom than Gwynnie.
Best for? Blokes looking to widen more than their horizons
News flash, men like to play too, and hard. Designed for boys who play hours on end, Simply Pleasure stocks the largest selection of sex accessories for guys in the land. The line up has been specially curated to focus on the joys of penile and prostate stimulation, from penis pumps to anal toys, donning the menu. Tip: browse through the lists, especially the best sellers to ensure you buy a toy that brings you maximum pleasure – the more intimidating it looks, the better. Wink, wink.
Best for? Students on a budget looking to get into the groove on Prime delivery
Whilst you’re shopping for your next full-length mirror, stocking up on Brita filters, extra batteries (think of the portable travel vibrator) and ordering lightbulbs, why not add a few sex toys to your already bulging Amazon cart?
Whilst most don’t associate the mega online retailer with bank account busting pleasure, there’s a bargain (or three) to be made in the sex toy department. If you’re unsure what to go for, trust the reviews – they are hilarious as well as informative, and whatever you decide to go for, you’ll bag a body safe toy or accessory that will make you scream joy for days.